For I Walk with the Dead and There Shall Be No Truer Companion

Anyone that's paid any degree of attention to me and my writings and rantings over the past year have come to hear the same ole blues tune of poverty and depression. This is a simple continuation of that.

I sit here in the dark listening to War perform their song The World is a Ghetto. I was reminiscing about the first time I saw Enter the Dragon. It was long ago. I still lived in Long Beach. Kung-fu films were all the rage thanks to The Karate Kid. For me it sparked a certain revolution cuz I saw some beauty in the wisdom of the martial arts. As Morihei Ueshiba-sensei so desperately tried to impart unto the world: martial arts is an expression of the beauty of living. It is truly art and with it comes some sense of peace and self-understanding.

Is it an odd coincidence I now live in a state that has a complete ban on mixed-martial arts competitions? I think that should mean something.

So here I am in a dark room listening to a sad song thinking of Bruce Lee's masterpiece... and one scene in particular comes to mind. The character Williams, as played by actor, martial artist and athlete Jim Kelly is arriving in Hong Kong and takes a look at the impoverished way people are living along the shore. He then says something to the effect of "Man, ghettos are the same all over the world."

I knew little of poverty then. To me it was just how people lived. Everyone was poor, so I thought, except politicians and big-business types. It would be years before I learned the difference between being poor on paper and having no papers to even be able to prove u exist. Cuz when ur flat-assed broke, u truly are an unperson. There definitely a difference between being poor and being "might-as-well-be-dead".

I sometimes wonder if all this shit I'm going thru is making me stronger or smarter or if I'm reaping ANYTHING at all that I can place a value on. As it stands here and now, I don't see anything. But I can claim this small bit of wisdom: just because I don't see something -- even if it's within me -- doesn't mean it isn't there.

I wrote a lot over the weekend. Thirty pages hand-written plus a short ad started another short. I believe I'm now more than 50% done with my first novel. Plz keep your fingers crossed for me.

I should be working on it today, but I spent the day working around the house and I'm just plain dead beat.

One of the major themes (for lack of a better word) working its way into the novel is the concept of individual freedom. The main character/protagonist even states at one point "I want to be free" and at another time he says "Ya know, one of these days it's all gonna end. Then I'll be okay." Not to give away too much, he sets himself up to disappear into the world's underworld. He makes himself an unperson so he can be free.

Damn. Did I just stumble across an answer there?

Hmmm...

Well, Ten Years After is tellin me to get on home. Clapton's up next and he'll be preaching his whole shtick about runnin' on faith. Keep strong, ppl. I'll try to do the same.